Stephen Hawking is a tough act to follow, but they may try some of the following:
Mikhail Gorbachev wouldn't have had a chance in the USSR; if he had tried his reforms there, he would have been sent to the Gulag.
If LBJ had ever been elected President in his own right, maybe he would have had some credibility for the policies he pushed.
The Beatles would never had become famous if they had tried to compose their own songs; they probably had no creative talent at all.
If New Yorkers ever experienced a terrorist attack, they wouldn't be such unpatriotic latte-sipping liberals.
If Mark Twain had ever traveled to the Mississippi river, he wouldn't have written such unrealistic nonsense about it and the people living around it.
If Martin Luther King, Jr. had grown up in the South, he'd never had gotten the education to become a minister.
If Charles Darwin had seen the Galapagos islands, he would have realized that only the Almighty God could have designed the beaks of all those finches.
(P.S. IBD has now "corrected" the editorial. That's futile; such idiocy is incorrigible and eternal.)
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If New Yorkers ever experienced a terrorist attack, they wouldn't be such unpatriotic latte-sipping liberals.
Sadly, I can easily imagine them saying something like this. (I even recall rabid Bush supporters who did say this back when terror-defense funds were being apportioned out and the government determined that NYC had no vulnerable landmarks of the magnitude of an Arkansas petting zoo.)
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